Thoughts on a grey day

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I’m nostalic.

Throwback: this photo was taken last year, the day before my first sugery. I had one hour to kill before class and I needed to seat down a minute and process everything that was going on. It was one of those rainy, cloudy and soothing days, like I love them and went to a coffee place close to school. I wasnt really realizing that I had cancer. I felt like it was just some little bacteria that we are removing or more like it was happening to someone else. I did not want to dramatize the cancer, I was not scared of it. Life has thaught me to control and to accept the fear of change and the fear of the unknown. It’s okay not to know, because at least God knows and that for me is a huge relief and it instantly calms my heart. Tawakkul (Trust and rely in God) is really the answer. Life is like school, it has given me so many lessons so I can truly understand what tawakul means. And Im very grateful for those lessons .

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